"home" in the Big Book

Twenty-two, and a veteran of foreign wars, I went home at last.

My wife began to work in a department store, coming home exhausted to find me drunk.

Shortly afterward I came home drunk.

One poor chap committed suicide in my home.

Here are some of the methods we have tried: Drinking beer only, limiting the number of drinks, never drinking alone, never drinking in the morning, drinking only at home, never having it in the house, never drinking during business hours, drinking only at parties, switching from scotch to brandy, drinking only natural wines, agreeing to resign if ever drunk on the job, taking a trip, not taking a trip, swearing off forever (with and without a solemn oath), taking more physical exercise, reading inspirational books, going to health farms and sanitariums, accepting voluntary commitment to asylums—we could increase the list ad infinitum.

This is a point we wish to emphasize and re-emphasize, to smash home upon our alcoholic readers as it has been revealed to us out of bitter experience.

His income is good, he has a fine home, is happily married and the father of promising children of college age.

We hope it strikes home to thousands like him.

Returning home we find a place where we can be quiet for an hour, carefully reviewing what we have done.

But drinking does complicate sex relations in the home.

If we have no such complication, there is plenty we should do at home.

Certainly he must keep sober, for there will be no home if he doesn’t.

Selfish and inconsiderate habits have kept the home in turmoil.

He is like the farmer who came up out of his cyclone cellar to find his home ruined.

Perhaps you will want to take the man into your home for a few days.

It may mean sharing your money and your home, counseling frantic wives and relatives, innumerable trips to police courts, sanitariums, hospitals, jails and asylums.

A drunk may smash the furniture in your home, or burn a mattress.

When your prospect has made such reparation as he can to his family, and has thoroughly explained to them the new principles by which he is living, he should proceed to put those principles into action at home.

That is, if he is lucky enough to have a home.

We have been * Written in 1939, when there were few women in A.A., this chapter assumes that the alcoholic in the home is likely to be the husband.

not have brought the pay envelopes home.

The bill collectors, the sheriffs, the angry taxi drivers, the policemen, the bums, the pals, and even the ladies they sometimes brought home—our husbands thought we were so inhospitable.

Perhaps at this point we got a divorce and took the children home to father and mother.

His friends have slipped away, his home is a near-wreck and he cannot hold a position.

Sometimes he drinks on the way home from the hospital.

You draw more and more into yourself and you think everyone is talking about conditions at your home.

Then that terrible tension which grips the home of every problem drinker will be lessened.

Perhaps your husband will make a fair start on the new basis, but just as things are going beautifully he dismays you by coming home drunk.

The head of the house ought to remember that he is mainly to blame for what befell his home.

Since the home has suffered more than anything else, it is well that a man exert himself there.

Instead of developing new channels of activity for themselves, mother and children demand that he stay home and make up the deficiency.

We all had to place recovery above everything, for without recovery we would have lost both home and business.

If he speaks of his home situation, you can undoubtedly make helpful suggestions.

It was the usual situation: home in jeopardy, wife ill, children distracted, bills in arrears and standing damaged.

Being intrigued, however, he invited our friend to his home.

At midnight he came home exhausted, but very happy.

The last three times, I got drunk on the way home from here.

He now returned home, leaving behind his first acquaintance, the lawyer and the devil-may-care chap.

Seeing much of each other, scarce an evening passed that someone’s home did not shelter a little gathering of men and women, happy in their release, and constantly thinking how they might present their discovery to some newcomer.

One man and his wife placed their large home at the disposal of this strangely assorted crowd.

This couple has since become so fascinated that they have dedicated their home to the work.

Many a man, yet dazed from his hospital experience, has stepped over the threshold of that home into freedom.